My life has been a bit stressed out and frantic lately, particularly with family stuff and work... I've found myself sitting in front of a computer for up to 16 hours a day and the rest of the time either on the phone, or racing around doing stuff. I was talking to my dad the other night who reminded me that sometimes it is okay to put myself first and to give myself some space and time.
So for the last 24 hours (ish - I was slightly later than I hoped starting last night) I switched off. I have been technologically free..... that is to say, no internet, no pc at all in fact, no MP3 player, no radio, no TV, no phones (mobile or land line), no car, no Kindle and as little as possible of anything else that involves electricity.... the kettle was permitted this morning as caffeine withdrawal would not have made it the calm day I was hoping for.
I don't usually do silence so that has been quite a challenge, as was being still and not finding things that had to be done. I've did allow myself a note pad and some paper, thinking I'd probably do some story planning or writing, but actually I found myself writing conciousness streams when the silence got too much outside my head and the sounds too much inside my head. Reading them back they aren't pretty thoughts but they made me focus a bit more on my current state of mind and what I actually want out of life.
I lit the candles this evening in the lounge and the kitchen, did some knitting and generally lost myself in my thoughts. I've done a fair bit of crying too which I obviously needed.
I feel very calm and my head is certainly a lot clearer than it has been in months... so to round things off I am going for a nice long soak in the bath (with candles and bubbles) before getting into a nice bed with clean linens.
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