I am on holiday........ well that is to say, I am not at work... I carefully booked 2 days off pre UK meet to get all the stuff I usually do on a weekend done so I can go away without worrying (and I've Monday off to catch up on sleep/relaxing as i am pretty sure already that even going as just a day visitor to the meet will mean I push myself too hard and over do it)
That said, it's nice to have days off work in July when for the first time in 4 years I am not using them to madly finish my assignments before the course deadline.... see there was an advantage to qualifying :)
After work last night I had a "talk about myself" session with my counsellor...... and joy of joy, he wants to talk about relationships and why I won't let anyone close..... then I got told off for being non co-operative when I kept changing the subject.......
Today I was meant to start off by relaxing post dog walk and, hopefully, getting in a couple of extra hours sleep...... only it's Thursday, which is bin day... okay this shouldn't usually be a problem, I've never known the bin wagon come until at least midday...... oh no, not this morning, 6.30 am and there are flashing lights, beeping reverse warnings (complete with woman's voice telling us loudly that's what is happening) as the wagon makes it's way backwards down the croft...... suffice to say there went my plans for extra sleep.
This morning I did laundry...... then it was time for Dental Torture, Part III........... the idea was to try and do two fillings ........ yeah, that failed, I have one filled tooth and one more gap, as the other tooth disintegrated in quite spectacular fashion.... the anaesthetic has worn off now and I swear that missing tooth hurts more than it ever did before the damn dentist started fiddling with them......... Part IV (the final segment) happens on 23rd July......... and that will involve having an impacted wisdom tooth removed........ joy.......
The rest of the day I was supposed to be taking it easy, only I couldn't settle to anything. I decided to knit a new Kindle cover..... only my magic looping skills failed and against a wall of frustration the entire ball of yarn, circs and about 2 inches of knitting ended up getting thrown across the room....... I tried to read, but I can't sodding concentrate....... the cats keep screaming at me for no reason and I have just about had it completely with the dog over the back whose owners just let it bark none stop........
Add to this that although I'm excited about the weekend I'm also really nervous...... I can't really put into words why, when I think about it I start feeling sick.... I did wonder about just not turning up, but I promised to note take at a panel on Sunday.......
Right now I'd really like a hug and for someone to tell me that it will all be fine.... *sigh* yeah, not going to happen in this lifetime....... I shall remain doomed to be the mad animal woman that lives in the house with the massively overgrown garden that the kids point and laugh at from a safe distance but run away from if I get within talking distance..........
I wish I could give you a hug and tell you it's going to be fine!! Every single time I've met up with internet friends, it's been amazing. There's a few moments of disconnect as you adjust to talking instead of typing at each other, but then it's ever so cool. And I am an EXTREME introvert - GRL in Albuquerque found me sitting at the edge of the hall (with a neatly spaced collection of other overwhelmed introverts), recuperating from all the people and contact. And that was ok, too. :)
ReplyDeleteIf you could give Clare London a surprise hug from Chris at Stumbling Over Chaos, I'd be much obliged - and I bet it's a conversation starter. Clare is SO MUCH FUN. A very sly and wicked sense of humour when you get her going. :D
Thank you
DeleteThe stupid thing is - I've been pottering off to meet new groups of people off the internet since about 1994... for some reason this time I just feel so out of my depth!
I shall find Clare and deliver your hug - I am sure this will cause much amusement!
Oh, don't feel out of your depth!! I've gone to GRL twice and Yaoi-Con once and just felt comfortable, once I got there. Overall, these are good people. (There's sure to be a snotty one or two, but they'll be easily avoided.)
DeleteHeh, looking forward to hear the post-hug attack report. You aren't the only person I've tasked with hugging Clare from me, so that'll just add to the fun. :D And if you see Jenre, please say hi from me as well.
I am jealous! I'll be continuing to unpack, with some bonus cleaning up at my old place for good measure.