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| The actual Orange of Chocolate Goodness (photo courtesy of our heroine) |
Once upon a time a Good Fairy bought to the magical land of Austria, a special jewel of such tremendous beauty that it split a family apart.... For it was a sphere of the darkest chocolate, flavoured with orange which, when smacked on the bottom (something the head of this family is very talented in doing) would fall into segments for sharing. But there was a disagreement over the sharing of such a fabulous thing and a terrible conflict commenced.
The three warring factions took up arms...well one of them did... for he was The Top and had taken possession of the jewel and was prepared to defend his prize by fair means or foul... to wit he paced the length of the study, where the sphere of chocolaty orange goodness was held, brandishing the a heavy, wooden paddle of evilness, in a truly menacing manner...
Sadly one of the combatants, an uncommmon houseboy (genus: brattus domesticus) was an early casualty of the war. Not injured in combat, but instead sidelined through a nasty virus and capture by the enemy. He was confined to a prison cell, and forced to lie in a giant bed, where a large grizzly stood guard over him... his fate is alas unknown as in due course he will appear before “The Court of The Top” for “Trial by Dominant” over the matter of neglecting his health and failing to get his flu jab... alas his punishment is expected to be severe and possibly quite painful….
And so, this leaves just one brave warrior to tale on The Top and retrieve The Chocolate Orange of Gloriousness....
Though she is the youngest and smallest of the three factions, and one who due to the rules of her own beliefs did not carry a weapon (whereas brattus domesticus is commonly found brandishing a wooden spoon with alarming skill) , she dived into battle using her innate skills of speed, stealth, and downright sneakiness
She knew she would not win a head on confrontation with the paddle wielding Top, this fearsome weapon was one she had been on the receiving end of before, so she bided her time and consulted the Topless ones for advice....
After lengthy consultation, the fearless young warrior had a plan to put into action...
On a quiet evening, whilst The Top was tired following a long and stressful day ruling his domain and keeping The Files of Law happy and content, our heroine, for that is what she is, attacked.
She didn't go for the Orange of Wonder, no for the advice she had been given was quite sound (unusual for any advice given by a bunch of Topless brats), and instead she concentrated her efforts directly on The Top....working feverishly with all the skills she possessed, sacrificing her body for the greater good, until when her joints ached and her skin was marked with red patches and dusky bruises ... but it worked... for, boneless, The Top had shuffled away to the bed where his other prisoner was being held, and fallen into a deep contented sleep....
Quietly, so as not to wake the watchdog that guarded the entrance to The Study, and whose loyalty was easily swayed by the possessor of the best treats, she tiptoed through the hallowed portals and entered The Top's most sacred place.
The most precious and special Chocolate Orange of Wonder lay, unguarded, in the centre of The Desk... but beside it one of the most fearsome of The Top's arsenal of weaponry, The Lexan, lay. It looked totally innocent, it's clear surface unmarked, the wooden desktop visible through it.
But the warrior knew better, and approached that implement of torture as though it was the most venomous of snakes.
Carefully she sidled around the desk, narrowly avoiding kicking the metal bin beside the great leather chair, until she was able to reach over the desk and snatch her prize.
Swiftly she retreated to the lounge, passing the watchdog’s toy box on the way and snaffling an old rubber ball, about the same size as the orange. With care, she opened the box which contained the Orange Chocolate wonder, and extracted the globe of goodness. Millimetre by anxious millimetre she peeled the sticker sealing the foil covering of the sphere and extracted, finally, the object of all their desires.
She placed the chocolate globe on the side of the sofa, and swiftly re-wrapped the foil… around the old dog ball. As she began to return the sphere to its box, she heard from above, the unmistakable sound of the bedsprings moving, followed by the heavy footfalls of The Top as he crossed the bedroom. Then came the creak of the door.
For a second she froze in place, before shoving the ball home and closing the box. Sprinting from the lounge back to the Study, she dropped the now worthless package on the desk next to The Lexan, only shuddering slightly as her fingers grazed the edge of the cruel implement.
The footsteps were getting closer now. It was a time for drastic action. As she fled the study and retrieved the Jewel of most wondrous chocolate, she bent and woke the watchdog.
“Outside?” she asked, tugging slightly on the heavy leather collar it wore. The dog stiffly rose to his feet, shaking slightly as its long legs stretched out, and followed her to the door.
A deep and menacing growl sounded from behind her as she fled towards the kitchen…. The Top was awake… The Top was unhappy.
“I’m just letting the dog out.” Our heroine called as she flung open the back door. The dog scampered out into the darkness, her paws crunching over the frost topped snow.
Carefully, the young warrior opened the pantry door and placed the orange chocolate sphere into the box of sweet delights that rested on the shelf, where it fell into a large collection of similar festive confectionery, much from faraway lands where they gave their chocolates funny names, and strange mysterious ingredients.
She’d just closed the pantry door when a large bearlike paw reached for her.
“Back to bed, now.” It’s owner said menacingly as he pulled her back against him. Still holding her, he called the watchdog back into the house and closed the door to outside. Our heroine allowed herself to be steered without protest back out of the kitchen and up stairs to the bedroom where, as directed, she slid calmly under the duvet, into the centre of the bed and turned onto her side, facing away from the predator.
The other prisoner, who had slept through, sighed in his sleep and turned over, snuggling into her even as The Top, took up his position between her and the door to the room.
“Sleep,” the top commanded, turning to lay a heavy arm over both of his brats.
Our heroine closed her eyes, a small smile ghosting across her face as she quietly celebrated the success of her mission. There was only one down side, but that was easily fixed, as she bent her knees forward and laid her frozen cold feet against the Grizzly Top’s legs.
The growl was instant, but the paw that landed on her backside was only a warning.
So… how long will it take for The Top to notice his prize has been tampered with? Will our heroine give herself away?? Will the uncommon houseboy notice the chocolate orange sphere in his pantry and spill the beans… or eat it all himself? Will The Lexan be called into play?? Who knows what the future holds…….
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